Butt Fatigue and Other Tales

Monday, 12 February 2007
First off, this is going to be a long, but fairly entertaining post considering it was a weekend of many firsts. So brace yourself :)
We were celebrating the birthday of another friend who has joined the ranks of the fabulous Thirty Decade. So in the afternoon, 5 of us girls kidnapped her from home (covering face with ski mask et al) and took her roller skating. It was quite an adventure. The Skate-and-Fun Zone is around 45 mins. outside of DC in a town called Manassas. Naturally it was full of suburban mom and dads with their screaming little tykes rolling around in skates to the cheerful tunes of Who Let the Dogs Out? Surprisingly, the DJ refused to play even the clean version of 50 Cent’s In Da Club, but he was fine spinning “clean songs” like Tempted to Touch, Naughty Girl and the redneck anthem Sweet Home Alabama. Surrounding the rink were gumball machines, a laser tag room, a pizza joint, and just a lot of cheerful and colorful stuff. Did I mention the strobe lights and fog machine? It was like being transported back to your childhood… which was the entire purpose of taking our friend there. I got my pair of rollerskates and bravely entered the rink. Unlike ice skating rinks, this rink did not have a fence surrounding the entire periphery. My friends tried helping me a bit before I fell on my butt for the first time. But kids were falling all over the place like flies – there was no reason I couldn’t do the same, so no fear. Two more butt falls happened, but after a pizza break, I got much better. Like ice skating, I learnt the trick to keep my balance and keep moving… just don’t look down all the time!!
The birthday celebrations continued in the evening with a sumptuous Indian dinner at Heritage. There was too much wastage of food since it was a pre-fixed menu. I also made an exception to my no-alcohol diet and had a glass of red wine. I didn’t drink anything else after that. Then we moved the party to a club called Andalu, also in the Dupont Circle area. The music was pretty decent and we all had a great time dancing. I don’t know at what point the boredom seeped in. I turned to a friend and said, “I think I want to hook up with a random stranger.” And I did. Some desi dude (and it's not that i was looking for a desi in particular, he just looked as bored) was hovering around and we started dancing. He tried to make conversation but I wasn’t obliging. “What’s your name?” he asked. “Doesn’t matter. Any name you want it to be,” I said. Really, there was no point in talking. Then suddenly another girl wanted to dance with him. He clutched my hand tightly – don’t go yet. Err.. ok, so what am I supposed to do? The girl turns to me and says, “You know, he’s a total whore.” I was amused and touched his six-pack. “Of course, he is.” But then she starts dancing with me… nothing wrong with that, it was nice music until whoa! she touches my butt. Umm, thanks but no thanks. I excused myself to go to the bar. Suddenly, six-pack guy grabs my hand, pulls my face towards him and before I knew it, there I was making out with him as my friends watched in shock and awe. As I came up for air, he said, “You must be a Punjabi.” But for a Punjabi himself, he did these weird Karate Kid-type dance moves. Also he thought he was being funny by saying he worked at a 7-11 and his wife (i know, what???) was waiting for him at home. “Goodbye, have a nice life and oh… keep working on those pecs,” I said. We ended up exchanging digits, but he blew it when he asked, “Is your name Deepali?” I stared. “Something like that.” Not that i was planning on marrying him anyway!
So first time 1) rollerskating 2) got hit on by a girl and guy simultaneously and 3) made out with someone without the influence of alcohol in a public place.


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